A Kawaii Memoir


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Posts tagged Romance
Not Wild Anymore

 Written: 04/04/18

It’s easy not being wild for you now

as my desire rots at your memory

this heart no longer emotionally endows.

It’s a blessing to feel illusions dwindle

where the story I crafted turns to reality

and the vision of you will never rekindle.

What once was my wish to feel a kiss

from lying lips with charming words

is now the narrative of loveless abyss.

It’s all gone, that wild loving feeling

Nothing about you will ever be appealing

All of our hidden truths are finally revealing.


~ Jade 🌵 

Like Tired Roses

 Written 02/26/18 

I am tired. All my roses have died, but I remember their petals and essence along my body. I remember the color like I remember their memories. The sensation of their heat on my worn hands lingers over my violin strings. The glass that held cupid's love, is filled with lukewarm attentions and murky messages. So you see,I am tired of love that comes in the form of dying flowers. I cling to their form, seeking the eternal. I cling to their form lusting for the immortal.

How I miss these roses, those delicate petals, the ones that carcassed like fairies on my skin and danced like sin in my bathwater. While I desire the truth, for why my love in you inspires. I would much rather feel that you love yourself more than you love a woman like me. I’m that woman who smiles at flowers, and kisses the thorns away, bleeding in loyalty, treating that soul like royalty. I am the garden, I am your home, one day you’ll realize the tears that built this place were not created alone. The tears that built who I am, came from the memories of tired blood-red roses. 


- Jade 🌹 

Ouch (2017)

Written 10/06/17

My feelings, flawed and fierce, never actually won.

I met you and my heart was severely undone. 

I gave you the world in words, and the universe in every action,

Still, a poets love is belittled to physical attraction

Despite the wariness of your heart, and the weariness of my soul

I thought with you, that happiness was a realistic goal. 




Embezzling my Heart it's gotta Stop (2017)

Written 09/04/17

This a moment where I’m pleading to a blurred crowd of potentials. In this crowd is the mirage of growth and love that presents itself as a friend or lover... actually call it a swipe. That’s what we do these days right? Swipe with this funny kindling of hope that maybe your value is worth someone’s gaze. Instead it’s a instant message maze. Wondering at 3 in the morning if things between you and them are beautiful or simply temporary gratifications and affections. At noon, when I’m glancing at my phone curious what happened to the attention at the witching hours I’m saddened. 

I don’t understand this part of the book. I liked our hands intertwined, and our blushing eroticism, and so I thought you did to. You said as much under moonlight, but wait only in moonlight. Oh. I see now. I’ve done it again. What do I do, when pieces of me get snatched from an anonymous heart. What do I do when I learn about false intimacy? I’ve been told I keep walking, and don’t look back but it’s hard when the best scammer smiled and said “I love you”