Jadedisland
A Kawaii Memoir

Poetry

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Posts tagged College age
Mixtape Friendship

Written 05/10/18

Doll it out, advertise it, market the kindness in every track. Sell it like an addiction, but disguise it as a trend. 

I'm kind, I love your outfits, we are the best of friends. I'll take care of you until the end, we are ride or die. 

 

Track one, completed the introduction and the lure of an intimacy in a friendly relationship seduction. 

Track two, the first memory, at last, a memory to last lifetimes. 

Track three, the first slip up, why did they do this to me?

Track four, forgiveness cause it'll be fine.

Track five, memories to hold you in place. 

Track six, fuck. 

Track seven, messed up again, more slip up...begging for forgiveness. 

Track eight, the whispers to other people. The rumors and fake smiles

Track nine, they stop listening but were you ever listened to?

Track Ten, times up, they are gone. 

 

Bonus Track you're left wondering where you went wrong, as the memories flood in with the orchestra serenading one last diss track. 

 

Welcome to the toxic friendship mixtape. 

- MC Empress Jade

Childhood Home

Written 05/10/18

When walking the streets of a hometown

a familiar dread sets in

memories rush in

thoughts get cloudy

lamps turn on, and everything is closed as you're settling in.

I'm stuck here. Again I'm stuck. 

Morning comes, and life passes on the same streets

and quirky neighborhood symbols strut bye. 

Greet your parents, then greet the tree from your youth

Time goes by and you remember that freedom isn't

in your childhood home. 

Wake up next morning and it's all there again.

Again its home, the same home you've been stuck in from the time your soul popped out into the world

your childhood home, Again.

- Stuck Empress

 

 

Loving Whiskey Ice

Written 05/10/18

Drank whiskey to live with a smile

Despite the fact come morning,

My problems lined up to fill a mile

There was something at the end of each glass, that reminded me I still existed

That all my choices weren’t to just pass

Each drop of golden bitterness

A moment to push me to the edge, 

From virgin to succubus kisses

The ice clings to stirrings in my heart, 

A warm blush of social boldness rushes in me, but I finally feel joy off the chart

They say it’s bad to seek freedom in whiskey

Makes the soul addicted while the liver weeps, all I’m trying to do is experience a life where my sorrow isn’t that deep. 

 

- Empress Jade 

Lost Millennial Generation

We don’t know who we are anymore.

We were lost in the sea. No lost on land.

Just lost.

This is the cost we must pay, despite the fact we did not run up this tab. We were never here to destroy the world that we live in. Instead just born into the corrupt environment that they blame us for. This is why we are lost. What can we give of ourselves when we are too busy fixing the mistakes of those before us. How can we identify when the world cries. How can we prove our worth as a generation. We are healing the scars of generations but it is a slow journey. We are seeking the knowledge abandoned by the mighty white conquerors but much is lost. We are creating a place safer for the fluctuating definition of what life means to us, but it is met by cruelty. So yes we are lost, but not by our doing. We are trapped in the cycle of fixing and fixing. Taking what messes they that came before us made and making miracles. Reshaping the complexity and uniqueness of humanity. Voicing the history of those forgotten. Understanding each other better. We take care of you, we save you, we protect you. Still we are lost only guided by bitterness, fear, and judgement from the mess makers before us.

Still we are lost, the me among the rest of the Millennials. Lost fixing and being the best of ourselves under the weight of generations. ~ Jade 🌵