Jadedisland
A Kawaii Memoir

Poetry

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Frozen Sensuality (2016)

Written 12/06/16

That's what it is. I've stopped & reached a point of neutral conversations, uninterested discussions, and no satisfaction. 

Why freeze a being whose body was meant to be moving and consuming. A chaotic nature that lived on passion and played games. Look at her now. The soul-searing kisses now lick drops off a mug of coffee. Hands that caressed stories now dwindle aimlessly. Eyes that tempted now gloss over everything in sight. 

Where are her external Muses, the compliments to her succubus nature, and her deviant partner? When will her frozen sensuality melt back into the passionate nature it was meant to be. This stifled being is navigating an empty life... 

This frozen woman looks through ice at the beauty around her, smiles softly and lets absence crawl up her body. She lingers in her frozen world letting dark memory shape her vision. There is no consuming nature, no lust driven smiles, no exploration through her hands. 

I know who she is, the frozen woman. She is his. His taint shaped into a body that looks like mine. She is his being, looking for the control and the compliments that navigated her puppet strings. She is his. 

She took over yet again, never really gone... I wonder often what triggered her return to my body. What made me remember her, the woman I was with a man who changed me. The woman who dared destroy the pieces of vibrancy that I held onto like royalty. The woman who rendered me a peasant and fear consumed monster seeking his compliments. Seeking... the ice of his gaze that captured a succubus and made her into Yukijorō. She died in his winter. The iced spirit of a passionate woman.